"I got so many kick in my ass, sometime when I in the bathroom, I still poop shoes"

Ahhhh....Fabio.  Absolutely my favorite reality personality, EVAH

If y'all aren't watching this season of Top Chef, you are missing out on the best walking talking sound bite in TV history.  This guy is a quote a minute.  The one above came when he was in front of the judges and they asked him about a little mishap he had earlier in the kitchen.  Thank God for TIVO, because I'm usually laughing so hard I miss the next three minutes of the show and have to rewind.

So last night, he doing the elimination challenge where he has to cook Lidia Bastianich's "last meal" (couldn't have picked a more appropriate chef for Fabio to cook for.....plus Felidia's is my favorite restaurant in NYC.....) when he breaks his finger.  The medic's show up and put a splint on it and wrap it up then ask him if he'd like to go to the hospital....he says "Hospital?  No way.  I will chop it off and sear it on the flat top and tomorrow I'll deal with nine fingers!"

SOB ended up winning the challenge and made it to the final four.  It's down to he, Stefan, Hosea and Carla (who is also F'n hilarious....those bug eyes kill me) in the finals in NOLA.  I'm going to predict a Stefan/Fabio finale with Stefan ultimately winning.  I'd love to see Stefan get overly confident and screw up so Carla could have a chance, but I'll be surprised if that happens.

All of this has absolutely nothing to do with my intended post for the day which happens to be some positively killer scones....Chocolate Toffee Scones.....ummm, yeah!

Look at those babies.  And they tasted twice as good.  Just ask my tennis team!  They moaned and groaned while they scarfed them down after our match today.  And in a good way.

Can anything be better than chocolate and toffee together??  This is one that I know my mama is going to be making.  I've caught her on more than one occasion eating toffee chips directly from the bag, so this is right up her taste bud alley.

My only advice, mama, is to make sure you have some buddies around to share them with or you'll eat the entire plate!

Here's the recipe:

Chocolate Toffee Scones

The Art and Soul of Baking

Makes 8 scones

For those who like their breakfast, tea, or snack time treats to be outrageously over the top, these decadent scones, filled with miniature chocolate and toffee chips, are just the ticket.  They are especially moist due to the inclusion of eggs in the dough rather than the usual cream or buttermilk.  You could dress them up with the grated zest of an orange or a handful of toasted and finely chopped walnuts or almonds, but the extra sprinkling of toffee chips already gilds these lilies.  The toffee melts, then cools into a crunchy, golden brown topping.  Oh yeah!

Ingredients:

2 cups unbleached all-purpose flour

1/4 cup sugar

1 tablespoon baking powder

1/4 teaspoon salt

1 stick cold unsalted butter, cut into 1/2-inch cubes

1/2 cup mini chocolate chips

1/2 cup plus 1/3 cup toffee baking bits

2 large eggs

2 tablespoons milk

1 tablespoon pure vanilla extract

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F and position an oven rack in the center.  Line the baking sheet with parchment paper or a thin silicone mat.  Place the flour, sugar, baking powder and salt in the bowl of the food processor and process for 10 seconds to blend well.   Add the cold butter pieces and pulse 5 times at 1 second intervals, or until the butter is cut into medium pieces.  Add the mini chocolate chips and the 1/2 cup toffee baking bits but do not blend them in.  In a small bowl, whisk together the eggs, milk and vanilla until well blended.  Pour the egg mixture into the processor and pulse another 25 times, or until the dough holds together in large, thick clumps.

Use a spatula to scrape the dough out onto a lightly floured work surface.  Gently squeeze or knead the clumps together until they form a cohesive dough  -  it may seem a bit dry at first, but will come together with a few kneads.  Pat the dough into a circle 7 inches in diameter and about 1 inch thick.  Use a chef's knife to cut the dough into 8 equal wedges and transfer to the prepared baking sheet, spacing them about 2 inches apart.

Lightly press the remaining 1/3 cup toffee chips onto the tops of the scones, dividing evenly.  Bake for 14 to 17 minutes, until fully risen and golden brown, especially around the bottom edges.  Transfer to a rack and let cool for 5 to 10 minutes.  serve scones warm or at room temperature.

Once baked, serve the scones within 6 hours, when they are at their freshest and most appealing.  Store uncovered at room temperature until serving time.

I made my dough, cut it into the wedges and put it on the baking sheet covered in plastic wrap and into the fridge the night before.  I pulled it out this morning to bake it before our match.  

This is a really easy recipe and everything comes together nicely in the food processor.  You need to make this one!